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Joke of the Day

"What does John Cougar Mellencamp get if he eats too much cantaloupe before he goes swimming? A melon-cramp."

"Not everything Donald Trump says is stupid. The Chinese built a wall 2,000 years ago - and they still don't have any Mexicans!"

"What do you call a dwarf psychic who has escaped jail? Small medium at large"

"Just remember, every day is a gift from God. Well except for Monday.. Satan slips that one in. He's a sneaky bastard."

"""Let's take a couple dozen over-stimulated children and give them enough sugar to kill an elephant."" - inventor of the birthday party"

"I believe that there are two things that we can all agree on: Boobs."

"What do you call gay sex between the founder of Scientology and a Native American? The Indian in the Hubbard."

"Imagine if things had been reversed. We'd be eating Lou Gehrig candy bars and getting Babe Ruth's disease."

"How many south americans does it take to change a light bulb? A Brazilian."

"I left three Cleveland Browns tickets on my windshield before yesterday's game. I came back and there were nine."