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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a seafood shop carrying a trout under his arm. ""do you make fish cakes?"" ""Yes we do"" replies the fishmonger... ""Great"" says the man, it's his birthday"""

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"My wife screams like crazy during sex... ...especially when I walk in on her!!!"
"If an Islamic man is murdered, what do you call it? A Muhommid-cide."
"________________________ With all the bad puns going around, I had to draw the line somewhere."
"What did 50 Cent say to his grandmother when she made him a pair of socks? Gee, you knit?"
"How do you find a dead body? Download Pokemon GO."
"What do you do when your car is making a really annoying noise? Open the door and kick her out."
"I came up with a new recipe for avocado and duck. I'm going to call it Quackamole."
"Little girl/boy: ""Mommy, I want to be a [PERSON I DISAGREE WITH] when I grow up."" Mom: ""Well pick one sweetie, you can't do both."""
"I was on TV last night When I'm drunk, I sleep anywhere."