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Joke of the Day

"The difference between a wife and a mistress? The mistress says ""Oh, darling - that was *wonderful*!"", and the wife says ""Beige. I think we'll paint the ceiling beige..."""

"A feminist and a reddit admin walk into a bar... Just kidding, they couldn't fit through the door."

"The difference between Julius Caesar and a Rapist? Caesar came, saw, and conquered, a rapist saw, conquered and came."

"A white officer pulls over a black man for speeding. The cop tells him to mind how fast he's going, lets him off with a warning, and tells him to have a good day."

"if a bear is attacking you play dead and then play resurrection this will cause the bear to either worship u or deny ur existence"

"Did you here about the guy who's whole left side was cut off? He's all right now."

"*returns lost dog* Lady: That's not him. He was white Me: *holding a brown dog* He asked to swing by the salon. Add the color to my reward"

"What should you do if you get lots of e-mails saying 'What's up Doc? What's up Doc?' Check for bugs in your system."

"Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend? She didn't suit his taste!"

"How do you circumcise a hillbillly? Kick his sister in the chin."