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Joke of the Day
"Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, it's too long."
Next Joke
"Daughter: Dad, you need a smart phone. Me: Will it make my dinner? D: No but- M: Good talk."
"Why are flowering plants such good test takers? Because they have all of the anthers!"
"Have you ever had sex while camping? I hear it's fucking in tents."
"Why did the fetus kill his twin? There wasn't enough womb for the two of them!"
"I dropped a piece of cheese on the airplane and i know it rolled forward and some piece of shit in first class is enjoying it now"
"[first day as a mechanic] ME: i would say this car is haunted"
"What do you get when you dry out a Stark? Raisin Bran"
"Bank robber: EVERYONE BE CALM AND NO ONE GETS HURT Guy from back of room: IM DATING UR EX WIFE BR: [sobbing] ok only one person gets hurt"
"Just when you think 2016 has finished killing celebrities... WHAM (George Michael)"