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Joke of the Day

"I can see clearly now the rain has gone; I can *backs into mailbox* see all obstacles in my way *runs over squirrel* omg I love this song"

"Why don't blind people skydive??? Because it scares the shit out of their dogs."

"If quiz is short for quizzical, what is exam short for? Exammical!"

"I bet the YMCA dance is allot harder to do in Chinese."

"What's the scariest thing a blind person can read in Braille? ""Danger: Do not touch"""

"Steve Irwin lived the way he died... With animals in his heart."

"I'm so bad at making decisions that whenever I hit a yellow light I scream, open my car door and throw myself out"

"It's cute how my boss called the plastic container on my desk a ""water bottle."" Yeah, that's the clear liquid I keep in there."

"What do you call an Italian man with a rubber toe Roberto"

"Every timeI see a mattress tied to the top of a car, I think....there's another prostitute making a house call......"