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Joke of the Day

"There are 10 kinds of people in the world... Those who understand hexadecimal and F the rest."

"What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had ? The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had !"

"ME: Hi I'd like to apply for a job as a contortionist ""When can you come in for an interview?"" ME: I'm flexible"

"Don't try to tell me that hungry is not an emotion because I feel that in my soul."

"Dogs are perfect napkins because they just think you're petting them."

"The thing about ice skating ... No matter how good you are, the hardest part is always your nipples."

"guys: women are a mystery. women: Here is what we- guys: LITERALLY WHAT DO THEY WANT? women: well for start- guys: Guess we'll never know!"

"Shattner didn't go to Nimoy's funeral, and Obama's been on the phone all weekend with the Vulcan ambassador, trying to smooth things over."

"What kind of cigarettes do hippies smoke? Yours."

"Q: How can you tell when a blonde is dating? A: By the buckle print on her forehead."