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Joke of the Day
"How many optometrists does it take to change a lightbulb? One or two? One.. ..Or two?"
Next Joke
"Eliza Bayne on Bikini Dangers Probably the worst thing you can hear when you're wearing a bikini is ""Good for you!"""
"[judge at restaurant] ""I will try... the lobster"" [2 hours later] ""I find the lobster guilty of money laundering and embezzlement"""
"Sex ed in Texas"
"Why are electric trains like a mother's breasts? They were both designed for the kids but it's the fathers who are always playing with them."
"Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet."
"My grandpa dropped this one on me over the phone. I'll see you in church, make sure you sit by the window."
"I heard Facebook is looking to start a program with insurance companies... It'll be called Friends With Benefits."
"Why did the mouse whisper into the elephant's ear? The giraffe put him up to it."
"I had issues with my wireless mouse... ...so i got a cable cat and now my problems are solved"