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Joke of the Day

"I redid my fence yesterday. It needed to be reposted."

"In retrospect, back in my club days I should have recognized there was a reason the beat always sounded like DOUCHE DOUCHE DOUCHE."

"The STAR WARS super agressive marketing will probably change the name of Easter to ""The Christ Awakens"""

"My girlfriend left me because of the way I face the toilet paper. I told her I can't help it... That's just how I roll."

"What did the mayonnaise say to the refridgerator? Close the door, I'm dressing!"

"OP's sex life."

"An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: My little sister ate it!"

"I have a joke about capitalism. I'll tell it to the highest bidder."

"A German entrepreneur is opening up a new furniture department store. Word is, its going to be called Kikea."

"My crazy neighbor claims she was robbed last night. I know she is crazy because I found all her medication as I was breaking into her house."