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Joke of the Day

"What would you call a superhero with Down's Syndrome? Ultra Downy"

"Getting really tired of you emotional women on Facebook. Stick some cotton in your crotch, eat a tub of ice cream, curl up to your body pillow, STFU and go to sleep"

"Sometimes I wonder about those old mattresses in the alleys, the stories they could tell. The ones about me are lies of course."

"Why does Bear Grylls love Bud Light? It's sterile and he likes the taste."

"Dear women married to homophobic racist adult males: Nice ass."

"Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? People like me have to go to work and don't have time for all that."

"Surprise your girlfriend by hiding in her trunk until you're dead."

"You know what the first sign of AIDS is, right? A severe pounding in the ass..."

"My drug dealer got me shoes for Christmas I dont know what they were laced with, but I've been tripping ever since"

"A Roman walks into a Bar. He holds up 2 Fingers and says ""Five Beers Please."""