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Joke of the Day

"- Michelle, we must break up... - Oh, I'll kill myself! - That's a nice bonus. Thank you!"

"What do you call a know-it-all that likes doing bad stuff to kids? Encyclopedophile"

"What did the Japanese General say to his kamikaze trainee? Despite what everyone tells you, you'll never learn from your mistakes."

"I don't mean to brag, but I just completed my 21 day diet in 3 hours and 15 minutes."

"I asked my Chinese girlfriend for a 69 last night. She said 'Fuck off, I'm not cooking at this time of night'"

"What do you call a Canadian singer eating French mustard on the roof? Ceiling Dijon."

"I'm planning on having a three-some with a chicken and an egg tonight I'll let you know."

"Greek Life Q: Why did the young Greek boy run away from home? A: He was not being reared right!"

"What do you call a zoo with only Giraffes? Giraffic Park!!!!!!! HAHHHAHAAHHAHAA"

"I recently broke up with my mobster boyfriend... Turns out he was sleeping with the fishes."