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Joke of the Day

"Kids today will never know the joy of being selected to go outside to dust the erasers."

"Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder to ""instruction manuals"""

"What's The Difference Between Santa and a Muslim? Santa will be able to enter the united states next year!"

"The liquor store clerk just wished me a merry Christmas as if she weren't going to see me 7 more times before then."

"Sean Connery walks into a library and asks for a book on solo photography. ""Shelf E,"" replied the librarian. ""Aye that's the one,"" said Sean"

"How can you tell if a man has a high sperm count? The girl has to chew before she swallows."

"I have a stepladder I never knew my real ladder"

"This election cycle makes me want to find a bar really badly... Do any 21st amendment people know where I can get a drink around here?"

"If only Africa had more mosquito nets Then every year we could save millions of mosquito's from dying needlessly of Aids."

"Me: Can I have some of your candy? 3-year-old: Can I have some of your beer? Me: 3: Me: 3: Me: Deal. Wife: NO!"