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Joke of the Day

"If one horse is in the corral, running around the perimeter of the fence,and another horse is running free in a field, which one is singing, ""Don't Fence Me In""? Neither. Horses can't sing."

"Seminar topic at the annual vampire conference ""How to Deal with Stakeholders"""

"Why was the composer late for work? He missed Debussy. I'll just leave."

"I'd just like to say I called Katy Perry's popularity the first time I saw the ""I Kissed a Girl"" music video. Also, I am tone deaf."

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just shoot the room for being dark."

"I'm sorry that you invited me over to your apartment for dinner and I created a negative Yelp review about the experience"

"I once had a friend who really wanted to get run over by a steam train When he did he was chuffed to bits"

"I just saved a bunch of monkeys on car insurance by telling them that monkeys don't drive so they don't need insurance."

"My cat must hate his litter box He just shits all over it"

"I taught my parents something today... They learned from their mistake."