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Joke of the Day

"I dont think I can be gay I just dont have it in me."

"What do you call a Chinese prostitute? Wun Dum Ho"

"FBI: If you testify you'll have to go into the Witness Protection Program ME: I'll do it FBI: Your wife and kids too ME: Oh ok never mind"

"My daughter told me this one today and it had me in stitches. Two goldfish are in a tank... One turns to the other and says: ""You man the guns, I'll drive"""

"Every girl I bring home is unemployed, drunk and on drugs. I'm starting to think that whole ""opposites attract"" thing is bullshit."

"What's the square root of sixty-nine? Eight-something!"

"Buddy, If you get in a fight with me there'll only be 2 ""hits""; You hitting me and my screams of pain hitting 100 decibels."

"Why did the little boy use his inhaler? ""No wheezin'"""

"I'm so tired I could eat a horse."

"The real reason OP never delivers.."