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Joke of the Day

"How do you get an iraqi woman pregnant? Cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest."

"Game: ""Would you like to try the tutorial first?"" Me: ""No."" *minutes later* ""How the f*ck do you play this?"""

"I bet a lot of people have tried that ""See you next year!"" joke at the end of December but got proven wrong by dying in a DUI."

"What do Paul Walker and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hit was the wall"

"Whenever I write a letter to someone, I add a footnote briefly explaining Ohm's law. It's my P.S. de resistance."

"How do Jedis close their programs on a Mac? They use Force quit."

"What do you call someone you want to be stepped on by? A crush crush"

"Yeah, I can't believe the shitty teenager making minimum wage at the coffee shop spelled your name wrong on your cup either."

"1st Witch: What's your new boyfriend like ? 2nd Witch: He's mean nasty ugly smelly and totally evil - but he has some bad points too !"

"What do a democratic Asian and a gay guy have in common? They both love an erection"