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Joke of the Day

"A drummer trips and falls on a sheep, a candy brand, and then a running faucet *Baa Dum tss*"

"How do you get a Jewish girl's number? Check her arm."

"What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison."

"Why did the dwarf go out of business? The overheads were too high."

"What does Morpheus seek for paper cuts? Neosporin."

"A man enters his house with a duck under his arm and says ""See, this is the pig I've been screwing"". ""What do you mean? That's not a pig."" his wife replies. ""I wasn't talking to you""."

"Why did they arrest the musician? He got into treble."

"Ladies, you should know that if I invite you to a movie I'm only after one thing: someone with a big purse I can store all my snacks in."

"Three feminists had a picnic... It didn't last long - none of them made sandwiches."

"After starting on August 15th, 2004, Julia Roberts just finished brushing her teeth a few hours ago."