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Joke of the Day

"Did you know; one hamburger only contains 4% of our daily need of vitamine -B This means we need to eat way more hamburgers!"

"Barista asks a customer if they would like their coffee black Customer replies ""what other colors do you have?"""

"Are you a power tool? Because i'd really like you to screw my holes *Pickup line a woman should use*"

"What is the worst thing about being an egg? You only get laid once, and that's by your mother!"

"Why did the scarecrow get an award? He was out standing in his field...."

"[hanging out w mob] ""Tony sleeps with the fishes"" *they all laugh* [self conscious about my sexual habits w fish]: its not a big deal guys"

"Hurt my back while sleeping last night in case you're wondering how I'd do running a marathon."

"What do canes and blue pills have in common? They're both ready for use when a man is limp."

"I never thought I'd buy into Feng Shui. But oh how the tables have turned."

"TIL the musical group Ace of Base was killed in a horrific traffic accident after they missed their exit on the highway and crashed... Police later said, ""they didn't see the sign..."""