24310

Joke of the Day

"Snow White succumbs to avian influenza as a message against the laziness of magically hiring animals to complete household chores."

"I hate roller coasters. They always have so much potential, then they go downhill."

"A snail can sleep for up to 3 years. I didn't know it was even possible to be this jealous."

"Alcohol does not make you fat. It makes you lean. Mostly against walls, tables, chairs, bars, floors & occasionally, weirdos .."

"German vegetarians are real pessimists. They fear nothing but the wurst!"

"Why doesn't Magneto wear his old costume anymore? Because days of fuchsia passed"

"Where does the dentist get his gas?...At the filling station"

"It's as if none of these people have ever seen a beer hat at the gym before."

"He said he liked surprises, but when I showed up late at night dressed as a clown and knocked on his window, it's all screaming and shit."

"Driving today I kept seeing protest signs. They all said ""End Road Work."""