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Joke of the Day

"me: wow a pegasus flying horse: actually Pegasus was just one horse we all have different names me: oh whats yours flying horse: Pegasus 2"

"My mum asked me if I had taken my lizard for a walk... ... I told her I was goanna do it later."

"Scientists announced that a man had chilled himself to absolute zero in an industrial accident. He's 0K right now."

"What do you call someone that lives next a horse? Their neighbor"

"I told my wife I didn't want to watch Kevin Heart's Seriously Funny because he is a sellout ""Not compared to Kevin Durant!"" She laughed. True story."

"A very old joke: why is the letter r so important? Because without it, our friends would be fiends."

"[clown cleaning shower] MRS CLOWN: Don't forget to remove the hair from the drain. [clown just keeps pulling long multi-coloured hair out]"

"What did the A/C unit say when it suddenly turned on? ""Sorry, I just needed to vent"""

"Why do pigs run into trees? To shake out the alligators. I've never seen an alligator In a tree. That's because the pigs do such a good job."

"How many optometrists does it take to change a lightbulb? 1 or 2. Just 1.... Or 2...?"