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Joke of the Day

"I'm not that great at origami... I cut corners."

"Wife says ""sorry I have my period"". I said ""that's ok honey, that's what the colon is for""!"

"Rob somebody at gunpoint today, show the world how serious you are at nicknaming your new friend Robert."

"Me and my GF split...she sais "" You never listen...."" Or something like that......."

"What did the elephant say to the naked guy? That thing sure is cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

"Which grocery department is great for digestion and your ""constitution""? Pro-deuce."

"What's the difference between feminists and guns? Guns only have one trigger. At the time I was writing this, my mom and sister were in the middle of a death battle yelling match, help."

"The rape game... --Do you want to play the rape game? --No! --That's the spirit..."

"Past, present, and future walk into a bar It was tense."

"Jay-Z's wife took him and their kid to the ocean for a day trip It was a Bey, Bey's bae, & baby bay day."