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Joke of the Day

"Old Lady at the bank I work at a bank, and one time an old lady asked if I could check her balance. So I pushed her over."

"I find it inconsiderate that policemen always ask if I had been drinking but they never bother to ask if I had anything to eat at all"

"When birds fly in a 'V' formation, one arm of the V is usually longer than the other. Do you know why that is? There are more birds on that side."

"NEW BASKETBALL IDEA: oblong basketball that gets thrown down a long field-like court. Maybe we tackle the guy who catches it?"

"What do Canadian women put behind their ears to attract men? Their ankles!"

"How many skateboarders does it take to change a lightbulb? One...but it takes him 27 tries"

"Did you hear that they are building massive oscillating blades in New York? I wasn't a big fan of the idea"

"Does killing time damage eternity?"

"what do you call an unqualified baffoon with an incoherent agenda? 2016 republican nominee Donald Trump"

"What's the best part of an ISIS joke? The Execution. Hehe...get it? No? Fine I'll be-heading off now."