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Joke of the Day

"I hear that in Star Wars VIII they're going to introduce Han's perpetually depressed younger brother. His name is Y Solo."

"""Do you want to play doctors and nurses?"" *flirty giggle* ""ok..."" ""I'm a specialist. The earliest I can see you is May next year"""

"My sex life has improved so much I'm thinking of asking someone else to join me..."

"""Sensitive"" guys who only retweet chicks, you're not fooling anyone."

"What is the best stand-up routine of our time? I nominate Chris Rock's Never Scared."

"Carmen Sandiego is probably in San Diego"

"""I don't even own a toilet."" - hipster who went too far"

"Have you seen the special message written at the bottom of a condom when you roll it all the way out? Me neither.."

"PRIEST: In the beginning there was the word ME: capsicum P: no M: tumescent gerund caliphate P: stop trying to guess the word M: maelstrom"

"What do you call a squashed Italian? A Nepalitano. Oh yeah - wait a sec - OK - for the low-info crowd here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Napolitano"