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Joke of the Day

"PRIEST: In the beginning there was the word ME: capsicum P: no M: tumescent gerund caliphate P: stop trying to guess the word M: maelstrom"

"I can relate to Alice in Wonderland. She just keeps randomly eating and drinking with the hope that it might magically solve her problems."

"How do you tell the difference between a Pakistani wedding and an ISIS training camp? I don't know, I just fly the drone"

"What can conspiracy theorists never explain? They say that 9/11 was an inside job... but planes fly OUTSIDE. Can't explain that"

"Puns plz Someone throw shit out there for me to make puns with. A topic, or whatever, and I'll do my best. Anyone else can join in too."

"I'll never be as horrified as the kid who suddenly realizes they've been following the wrong ""mom butt"" at the grocery store."

"My dad once said 'why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids and asteroids called asteroids and not the other way around?' I still laugh..."

"If your Uncle Jack was stuck on the horse... Would you help your uncle jack off the horse?"

"Wanna hear a construction joke? Oh wait, I'm working on it"

"My old guitar teacher was arrested yesterday... He got caught fingering A Minor."