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Joke of the Day

"America only considers a war a success if we build a Bed Bath and Beyond in the enemy's capital."

"I'm pretty sure Kanye West is the reason why we arent allowed to retweet our own tweets."

"I started up a poster design company called ""Original Poster"" We don't deliver."

"My mom has been trying to forward me an email since Monday June 23rd.....it's now Friday June 27th.... still no email"

"It's fun to smudge your lipstick and ruffle your hair before you come out of your bosses office, then give your work colleagues a wink."

"You're probably naked under all those clothes. You slut."

"For Christmas last year I got a sweater. This year I'd prefer a moaner or a squirter."

"I recently won a punctuation competition. My prize was an apos-*trophy*."

"Want to hear a joke about black people? Never mind it won't work"

"If I could go back in time & change any event that would alter the course of history: I probably wouldn't have super sized that fry order."