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Joke of the Day

"""You stand accused of 3 counts of first degree murder."" ""Look, I'm a lot of things--"" ""Are you a murderer?"" [bites lower lip] ""Little bit."""

"Who was the stretchiest man in The Bible? Abraham. He tied his ass to a tree and walked up a mountain."

"What's the difference between Hitler and a marathon runner? The marathon runner can successfully finish a race"

"A midget walks into a bar I guess it was set too low"

"Postmodernism pun Hi all, I'm trying to come up with a clever pun on postmodernism but I'm stumped. Does anyone have any clever puns on postmodernism?"

"If you made a wall hanging out of cheap necklaces bought from the merch tables at small, underground rock concerts... Would you have a Decoration of Indie Pendants?"

"If someone offered you drugs, always say yes because drugs are expensive Jk stay in school kids"

"My friend asked me if I was ever going to stop singing Wonderwall... I said maybe."

"My Spanish teacher taught me the word for ""Transgender"" I asked him if the word is masculine or feminine"

"""on your left u see fred in camo, on your right is bertha, she has ridden many miles on that electric cart."" If walmart had tour guides."