230236

Joke of the Day

"I can't wait till I have kids so I can drive slowly past McDonalds and tell them there's food at home when they ask for some.."

"thousamds of yrs ago i used up mankind's only wish & got peas placed on this earth. all the wars coud hav been prevented if i hadnt mumbled"

"What is a gay man's favorite vacation site? He loves to go to Bankok."

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The P is silent."

"What's the difference between Sarah Palin's mouth.... and vagina? Only SOME of the things that come out of her vagina are retarded!"

"I know a guy addicted to brake fluid He says he can stop at any time"

"No thanks, heavy metal concert. If I want lots of screaming without understanding the words I'll just hang out with my toddler."

"My friend used my stereo and it sounds like crap now I can't forgive its infidelity"

"Do not drink and drive.. because there are people out there who text and drive... and they will hit you and it will be your fault !!"

"being a writer is a great job if you love looking at a blinking cursor and wishing you were dead."