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Joke of the Day
"I'm sure Santa is black... He only works one day a year."
Next Joke
"I'd make a joke about desecrating animal corpses But it would just be beating a dead horse."
"Donald Trump walks into an elevator... and a gorgeous woman is inside and says, ""When the doors close, I could drop to my knees and blow you."" Trump replies, ""And what's in it for me?"""
"Me: I got my YOLO tattoo covered up GF: Good. I told you it was just a stupid fad Me: I know GF: What'd you get? Me: *reveals Minion tattoo*"
"Why is the pussy slit verticaly and not horizontaly? So it doesn't clap when running."
"I've heard that 1 in 3 people have a pedophile as a neighbour. But that can't be right because my neighbours are sexy 5 and 7 year olds."
"How can I go to sleep when this movie I've seen 70 times just started?"
"When is the month when the most trees fall? Sep-timber"
"A man falls in love with a nun and they run away together... The church says it doesn't mind, as long as he doesn't get into the habit."
"I make my girlfriend work out 5 times a week and eat healthy. I don't want her getting fat like my wife."