230030

Joke of the Day

"What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese."

"The world has gotten so politically correct that I don't know what is appropriate to throw at a crying baby in a restaurant anymore."

"What does Bill Cosby have in common with a Pokemon trainer? He makes sure his catch is weak before he throws his balls at them."

"That awkward moment when you can't decide if it's just a bad pic or you really look like that."

"Dear congress, please text and drive.#governmentshutdown"

"Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: ""Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet"""

"I'm going to get some hate here. Is methodist a religion that worships meth?"

"Wanna screw with your idiot friends on Facebook? Post that Obama passed a law to stay in office a third term this morning. Praise Jesus."

"[Jesus at Last Supper] *breaks bread* This is my body *pours wine* This is my blood *opens jar of mayo* Judas: I'm gonna stop u right there"

"Bought a blowup doll today but I won't blow her up til tomorrow. Don't want to seem desperate."