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Joke of the Day

"Girl, you gotta be tired coz you been runnin through my mind all day. Note to self, stop saying that pickup lines to the girls in wheelchairs."

"Science builds airplanes and skycrapers Faith brings them together"

"Manager: Twenty teams in the league and you lot finish bottom? Captain: Well it could have been worse. Manager: How? Captain: There could have been more teams in the league!"

"All new Hell's Kitchen tonight. Going to get into the spirit by hanging out in the kitchen and scream at my wife while she cooks dinner."

"Whats the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly your dick down someones throat."

"What do you get if an elephant has sex with a rabbit? A dead rabbit with a gaping asshole."

"Teacher to russian student: Boris, beware, I have eyes in my back! russian student: What Are you braging about? I came from Chernobyl, I had a tail!"

"Which video game would Adolf Hitler play? Mein Kraft"

"The man is crying on the cemetry. -Why did you leave us so early? He is asked why are you so crying? Do you cry about your close relative? -No, I am crying about the first husband of my wife."

"Hundreds of women are battered in the US every day And all this time I've just been eating them raw..."