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Joke of the Day

"I ended up in jail the other night and the guys across from me had glued themselves together... It was very confusing."

"Tacky on you, that outfit is! Tacky on who? [Tachyon!](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tachyon) Who's there? Knock, knock!"

"A cat's love is like nothing you've ever experienced unless you've dated a completely aloof murderer with autism."

"What kind of soap do you use to clean a dirty joke? Bawdy wash."

"Y'all know what they call Jamaica? Grease of Western Hemisphere. Disclaimer: Does anyone here know where this is from? Heard my friend say it, was wondering where he got it from."

"The only thing sadder than doing nothing with our lives, is spending our time watching others do the same. #RealityTV"

"Q:What should Iraq get for its air defense system? A:A refund."

"How do you use a philosophy degree in a professional context? *Why* would you like fries with that?"

"What has seven arms and sucks? Def Leppard"

"Heard this from a homeless guy in Philly What did one testicle say to the other testicle? Ya know, just between you and me, that guy's a dick."