229705

Joke of the Day

"My son asked if masturbating made you blind. Depends on where you're aiming."

"""Alright kids, I just got off the phone. Now, raise your hands if your parents are still alive!"" ""Not so fast, Billy."""

"I like my women how I like my wine... ten years old and in my basement."

"Legal tip for men: if you get a free t shirt at a bar, you're not required to keep it forever, like they can't arrest you if u throw it out."

"I submitted a group of puns to a pun judging contest hoping one of them would win. No pun in ten did."

"Who won the animal race? The giraffe and the aardvark were running neck and neck but the aardvark won by a nose!"

"i'd like to move to the fifth most populated city in france i've heard it's nice."

"What's the difference between an athlete and Hitler? An athlete succeeds in ending a race."

"What do you call the woman on the end of a line? Entities. (I AM SO SORRY, GAME PROGRAMMER JOKE)"

"Cashier: ""Would you like to donate to charity today or are you a giant piece of shit?"""