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Joke of the Day

"Money may not buy happiness, but pondering your problems on a tropical island would sure beat pondering them on your couch."

"Did you hear about the scarecrow that got promoted? He was outstanding in his field..."

"Where did the little Asian girl go when the little boy dropped by? Everywhere."

"Like my Father always said, ""I put my ass kicking boots on every morning"" ""Then after a long day of getting my ass kicked, I come home from work and take them off."""

"I told my friends that I'm going on a date with a gorgeous girl, and they teased me that she's imaginary. Joke's on them, they are too."

"How do ya get a fag to fuck a woman? Shit in her pussy"

"How do you make a cat sounds like a dog? Douse it in gasoline and set it on fire. *WOOF*!"

"What do you call an Indian bloke in a submarine? Mandeep."

"I'm a man of my word... and that word is ""unreliable"""

"""Women don't like me, idk why?"" ""Maybe it's because they sense you're a psycho who will decapitate their cat?"" ""No, that can't be it."""