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Joke of the Day

"What helps put a Jew to sleep? gas"

"INTERVIEWER: what's your greatest strength? ME: shape shifting INTERVIEWER: is that so? INTERVIEWER: yes INTERVIEWER: holy shit"

"What is the greatest right given to Muslim women? The right to remain silent."

"What is a Catholic's favorite weapon? Nun-chucks."

"What do you have in December that you don't have in any other month ? The letter ""D"" !"

"Friend showed me all the pics taken from the drone he got for Christmas, so I won't be renting the cottage on their farm after all."

"So I was fucking this woman... And she said that she wanted 12 inches and she wanted it to hurt, so I stuck it in 3 times and hit her with a baseball bat."

"I would tell you a joke about pizza... ...but it would be too goddamn cheesey."

"Mechanics How can you tell a mechanic has just had sex? One of his fingers is clean...."

"What's the difference between a bus station and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station, the other is a busty crustacean"