228396

Joke of the Day

"[Updates Christian Mingle bio] ""Just like Moses, I pay attention to the bush first"" ""You have 999 new matches"""

"i was just singing radiohead's 'creep' into my cat's ear and he started meowing it along with me then we both took a shit in his litter box."

"what's brown and sticky? A stick."

"We come to love not by finding a perfect person... but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."

"Don't bore a girl by saying she's beautiful, like every other shallow creep Grab her interest by saving her from a staged hostage situation"

"When I fall down a public venue, ""Did anyone see me"" totally outranks ""Am I ok"" on the thought process."

"How does a vagina tell time? With a twatch"

"I'm surprised that more people don't shoot at the signs on Target stores."

"What is the difference between a dentist and a New York baseball fan? One yanks for the roots, the other roots for the Yanks."

"Q: What do you get when you cross a perm with a rabbit? A: Curly hare."