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Joke of the Day

"I knew my daughter would be a slut when this bitch was 3 months old Instead of drinking the milk out of the bottle, she takes the bottle out her mouth and shakes it all over her face"

Next Joke
 
"I'm so damn tired. I haven't slept since last year."
"How do you feel about euthanasia? I think we can exploit them by increasing our amount of sweatshops."
"How many Donald Trump supporters does it take to change a light bulb? None, they've invented torches."
"I just taught the dance floor a fucking lesson."
"Men can't have multiple orgasms so having sex several times is hard Then soft, then hard, then soft"
"Auto-correct is so crazy now a days... My mom meant to text me 'I love you' but it auto corrected to 'You're a disappointment.'"
"I don't hate you, I'm just not necessarily excited about your existence."
"Oh man, I think I took a wrong turn somewhere. Looks like I'm gonna have to backtrack 25 years."
"Guy:Hey what are you doing? Girl:unzipping it Guy:why? Girl:I want to see how big it is. .. *Unzips tent and gets inside* Girl:nice, nice.."