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Joke of the Day

"Forget everything you learned in College.... ""Forget everything you learned in College, you won't need it working here."" ""But I never went to college."" ""I'm sorry your not qualified to work here."""

"Potty training my twins is like the Titanic's maiden voyage... In the beginning we are excited, in the end everyone is crying and all wet."

"KID:Dad what's the difference between a gerbil and a rat DAD WHO IS A MAFIA BOSS:A gerbil sleeps in a cage and a rat sleeps with the fishes"

"So the Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop And he says ""Can you make me one with everything"""

"Fellas; There's no heterosexual way of taking a selfie."

"What's better than roses on my piano? Tulips on my organ."

"Why was the tampon flying down the school hallway? He was late for his next period."

"What is the difference between a Train and an Hamster ? The train got windows"

"What do you call a cat that's guilty of infidelity? A cheetah"

"Wife: (shouting) Stop watching porn,..... Wife: (shouting) Stop watching porn, I can hear it in the kitchen. Husband: I'm not, it's Sharapova vs Serena."