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Joke of the Day

"Porn is so unrealistic. There's no way a guy with a ponytail could have a house that nice."

"People say I'm odd because... I CAN'T EVEN"

"Did you hear about the Mexican painter who lost two fingers? After the incident, he could only tres."

"I shot my first turkey today! But for some reason everyone in the frozen food section acted really surprised."

"What do Muslim men do during foreplay? Tickle the goat under the chin."

"[donating blood] ""You're looking a little faint. Can I get you a drink?"" ""No thanks, I've just had like 60 of those strawberry Capri Suns."""

"The people in Bahrain don't like The Flintstones But those in Abu Dhabi do"

"What do a gynocologist and a pizza boy have in common? They can smell it but they cant eat it!"

"What is Jesus' favorite gun? ... a nail gun!"

"look son, i kinda need you to go to hong kong & win a martial arts tournament to the death for me because i sorta told my neighbor you did"