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Joke of the Day

"What does Cam Newton and Fig Newton have in common? They both crumble under pressure"

"How strict is the ""I licked it, it's mine"" policy? There's some things I've licked that I don't want."

"What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights? A Sir conference."

"Marshawn Lynch came back to play for the month of October. Breast Mode"

"When the professor starts off the semester asking ""Why are you here?"" So I can get a job."

"I order to stay in the Navy, I had to take a course in anchor management."

"What could possibly make moviegoers forget about Will Smith's movie After Earth? A Concussion."

"Why did Einstein cross the road? So the other side could get to him"

"I grew up in Bolivia but I left because the currency is bullshit."

"I invited my girlfriend to go to the gym with me, then I didn't show... I hope she gets the message that we aren't working out."