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Joke of the Day

"Good thing you put a swing in your birds cage he's probably on that thing like ""MAN THIS IS WAY BETTER THAN FLYING"""

Next Joke
 
"He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick."
"I once asked a girl out on a date to perform in my favorite hobby. She demanded there be no strings attached We had a shit day flying kites"
"I'm really good at sex I ALWAYS come 1st."
"So I recently opened a suicide bomb shop in Syria, and it's doing great! Prophets are going through the roof."
"Why did the children cross the playground? To get to the other slide."
"What do you call an Irishman sitting on your front porch? Paddy O'Furniture"
"A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking."
"My wife says she's leaving me because of my addiction to antidepressants. Won't be needing them anymore then."
"People used to laugh when I said I wanted to be a standup comic. Well, no one's laughing now. Wait."