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Joke of the Day

"Say what you want about Lance Armstrong, but I think being the first man to walk on the Moon is an amazing achievement. They can never take that away from him..."

"GOD: look what I created [points to clouds] ANGEL: what am I lookin at? GOD: Is it a bunny? A man face? It's up to you! ANGEL: are you high?"

"AA MEETING Chairman: Please, introduce yourself Eminem: Hi! My name is.. C: What? E: My name is.. C: Who? E: Hi! My name is.. C: Huh?"

"What do you call two Mexican firefighters? Hose A and Hose B"

"I've never falsely accused someone of hacking, whether aimbotting, wall hacking, or speed hacking They were all just really good at hiding it!"

"Q: Why did the ghoul knit herself three socks? A: Because she grew another foot."

"What is the most effective form of birth control? Abortions."

"A coworker of mine recently had a miscarriage and it really changed her. She's not the same joyful, full-of-energy kind of person she used to be. It's like she lost her inner child."

"LPT: For those of you that always feel the need to click on every link (and end up wasting a lot of time on the internet).. ...gotcha."

"A group of sex toy manufacturers are discussing the success of their products... and they decided that only dildos had really achieved market penetration."