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Joke of the Day

"i am asking my dad ""Dad you look tired."" ""Oh, you mean the dark circles under my eyes? Those are the shadows of my great deeds."""

"Eventually, the entire written English language will be taken over by emoticons. Teenage girls will bring us back to Egyptian hieroglyphics."

"Why are the sheep in Africa coloured pink? The elephants are using them as tampons"

"""What's a karate experts favorite drink?"" ""Karatea!"" Fargo is the shit..."

"I heard Matt Damon took it real hard when he heard Robin Williams died. I just hope he remembers. It's not your fault. It's not your fault..."

"Why did the nigger walks into a bar? Because the cell doors was still locked"

"Me: I get most of my tweeting material from you son. 9: I'm glad I expire you. Me: See what I mean."

"I'm so glad I was young and stupid before there were camera phones."

"When a cow laughs..... does milk come out of her nose?"

"The whole Greek Mythology could be summed up in one line............ ""Unfortunately, Zeus was feeling a bit too horny."""