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Joke of the Day
"What's black and yellow and doesn't float? A bulldozer."
Next Joke
"What do nosey peppers do? They get Jalapeno business!"
"A guy goes to the doctor for his annual checkup, and the doctor says, ""You need to stop masturbating."" ""Why?"" the man asks. The doctor replies, ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""
"Apparently people will pay to be subjected to medieval torture devices if you call the place a ""gym."""
"I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial."
"Teacher and John Teacher: John. Give me a sentence beginning with ""I"". Paul: I is the... Teacher: No, John . You must say ""I am"" not ""I is."" John: All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
"I can hear my girlfriend in the other room cleaning up my cat's pee. As soon as I think she's done, I'm going to yell out ""I'll do it babe!"""
"FOR THE LAST TIME, MY EYES ARE UP HERE I yelled at my gynecologist"
"There's a new study out from the Department of Education... It shows that two thirds of Americans don't understand fractions and the other half don't care."
"Polynesian Hey, ever heard of the homesick, nymphomaniac Polynesian girl? Yeah, she kept longing for Samoa...."