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Joke of the Day

"Luke: Did you get the card I made you? Vader: I couldn't read it. Your handwriting is awful. Luke: I HAD TO WRITE WITH MY LEFT HAND."

"people don't want art, they want garbage. and thats what i sell. i've been losing some business to the art store next door but thats a fluke"

"""There's no use crying over spilt milk."" Unless you spill it on a winning Powerball ticket, then you should probably cry."

"A dyslexis boss fired a man today. The court said it was first degree homicide. (Fired fried)"

"Why do Lannisters hate turtles? Cause they can't stab them in the back"

"Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had not arms."

"How are Americans and poles similar? Running into one could really ruin your day."

"I combined all my wrist watches to make a belt I guess you could say it was a *waist* of time"

"Why did the toilet paper stop crossing the road? It got stuck in a crack."

"All the toys in Toy Story are pervs Their whole world and life revolves around being played with by little kids."