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Joke of the Day

"What do Hitler and teenage girls have in common? They both use chemicals to remove the polish."

"What do you call a story about a broken-down computer mouse? Depressing. \**crickets**"

"First cave man to 2nd cave man: ""I don't care what you say. We never had such unusual weather before they started using bows and arrows."""

"Boeing 787 The Boeing 787 Dreamliner has had so many leaks from the fuel and oils on board that they are re-naming it the Wet Dreamliner! C.H."

"Carson: No it wasn't a friend it was a close family member. And I didn't stab her I froze her heart. ""Sir, that's the plot of Frozen."""

"Yesterday was National Girlfriend day and my girl friend really enjoyed it .. ... my wife .. not so much."

"Why can't a blonde dial 911? She can't find the eleven"

"My name is David and I had my ID stolen the other day. Now they just call me Dav."

"I bet Lady Gaga covers herself in glue and just rolls around in random objects."

"My boss said to me. ""You're the worst train driver. How many have you derailed this year?"" I said "" im not sure, its hard to keep track"""