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Joke of the Day

"Q. How are men like television commercials? A. You can't believe a word either one of them says and they both last about 30 seconds."

"Why was the bullet train behind schedule? Because it had a bad conductor."

"My hope for you is that you someday find the end of your sentence"

"Mosquitto and Blondes what's the difference between a Mosquitto and a blonde? A Mosquitto stops sucking when you slap it !"

"It's not love until you don't want them to have a good time without you."

"Remember to horrify your friends and family by testing out your tweets on Facebook today"

"What's the difference between pussy and parsley? Nobody eats parsley."

"According to the bible, women's first mistake was listening to the devil. Man's first mistake was listening to the woman."

"If I ever met an exact duplicate of myself I wouldn't hang out with him. I'm too cool for that fucking nerd"

"Have you heard of the band named 1023 megabytes? Of course not, they haven't made it to a gig yet."