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Joke of the Day

"What does the parrot thinks as he looks at the newspaper in the bottom of his cage? ""Same old shit"""

"Why are tuna fish so bad a playing Tennis? They keep getting caught in the net!"

"What kind of file do you need to turn a 8mm hole into a 40mm hole? A pedophile"

"What were the protestors outside Erin Andrew's court house shouting today? White Nudes Matter!"

"""Oh, not much, just grooming my magnificent, powerful wings, you?"" -Pegasus every time a normal horse calls him"

"Why did the gold fish cross the road? To go to /r/antijokes"

"Dad do you like baked apples? Yes son why? The orchard's on fire."

"My favorite sex position is the Ronald Reagan cause i'll bang russia and break a wall did it suck?"

"How do Jews shower? The same as you idiot. First we get nice and we.. Wait, it's a trap! The gas its too mu... faint scream"

"The music played on HGTV shows can be described as ""Got drunk and wrote a dance song on a synthesizer."""