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Joke of the Day

"Why are storms always called girls names? Because when they come they are always wet and uncontrollable, and when they disappear they take or destroy all your stuff"

Next Joke
 
"What did one statue say to the other statue he hadn't seen in a while? ""Statue bro?"""
"I feel like I'm not giving my followers enough in my tweets. Would you be interested in stock tips or free shampoo samples?"
"GUY: I wish girls liked comics. GIRL: I love comics. GUY: Oh really? Then what's the Hulk's favorite flavor ice cream?"
"name a hurricane ""Jesus"" cuz then u could say ""Jesus is coming"" & have unaware ppl frantically prepare for rapture"
"What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye Matey"
"What did the Hand say to the Penis when they first met.... Nice to beat you!"
"Do you know Mike? Mike ock"
"What does oral sex in a nursing home taste like? (shrugs shoulders) Depends."
"When Microsoft and Apple ship faulty products Microsoft: We will fix that faulty battery timer through a software update. *never fixes it though* Apple: *quietly removes the battery timer*"