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Joke of the Day

"Some people just don't understand evolution. I was talking to an Australian the other day who actually thought *he* came from Darwin! All credit to Milton Jones for that one."

"I hate it when kids say that they hate vegetables. Like what the hell did Steven Hawking do to you?"

"What do men and tile floors have in common? ...if you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years."

"I took my item up to the counter. ""I'd like to return this,"" I said, with a tear in my eye, ""It didn't work."" He said, ""I'm sorry. We can't do that with condoms."""

"Are Ginger Ale made from real gingers? Said Cartman."

"Turkey shot down Syrian helicopter at the border. How did they train it to do that?"

"15 Is The Age Where You Either Look Like 11 Or 25."

"We could save a lot of hassle if we just made macaroni out of cheese in the first place."

"Sorry if you don't like my Honesty. But to be fair I don't like your f*cking Lies"

"How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they have machines for that these days"