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Joke of the Day

"I love Chinese food as much as the next guy, but you'll never convince me a chicken fried this rice."

"Ok you with pneumonia, go sit between the perfectly healthy lady and the guy with the blood shooting out of his leg and wait. -hospitals"

"Now I see why the Jamaica's flag is Green,yellow and black.. It's the color bananas go....."

"Two guys are drinking at the country club bar... First guy says, ""Hey, you want to go play some golf?"" Second guy says, ""No, not today."" ""Why not?"" ""Because I never drink and drive."""

"Tension at work Local engineer was fired after building a road over a creak further up stream then planned. Dispite his long years of service, it was a bridge too far."

"Some Days you're the dog and some days the hydrant."

"one time i went to the bathroom and i didn't know my xbox headset was still on and the other gamers heard me give myself a pep talk"

"What do you call a soldier with long arms? An army soldier"

"Hamburglar search history: sentence for stealing burgers do inmates get burgers what is prison ""beef"" countries that don't extradite"

"Blow Bubbles ""Hey"", I said to my friend. ""You ever blow Bubbles?"" ""Of course I did"", he said. ""Well,"" I replied, ""I think he must have liked it. He's back in town and asking for you."""