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Joke of the Day

"What would happen if pigs went on strike? They'd form pigget lines."

"If we're talking and I suddenly look off into the distance at a copse of trees that means I'm thinking of burying you there."

"What kind of peanuts get warts? Planters."

"My favorite knock knock joke ""Knock knock"" ""Who's there"" ""I eat mop"" ""I eat mop who?"" *Laughter and pointing*"

"Are you a Farmer? Cause you know how to raise a cock!"

"WIFE: *spells out words so the kids won't know what she is saying* ME: [to the kids] I don't know either."

"Archaeologists digging in a pyramid in Egypt found a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts. Experts believe it to be Pharaoh Roche."

"What programming languages would we use if C didn't exist? Ans: PASAL, OBOL and BASI"

"I just googled: how to deal with low frustration tolerance. In the first article, in the first paragraph, I yell at the screen, ""WELL THIS IS JUST FUCKING STUPID!"" True story."

"The Vietnamese world domination: one nail salon at a time."