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Joke of the Day

"A Woman Comes To The Physician - Herr doctor! My husband is very sick! - OK. Get undressed and show me what does he complain of..."

"New gym is great. Free robe service. They shaved the top of my head? Gardening, masonry. Chanting. Swore an oath and live at the gym now."

"Goya tried to cover up a disaster at one of their factories Someone spilled the beans."

"Where did the Martian put his teacup? On his flying saucer."

"My wife asked me recently to do something to commemorate our pet dog who got run over and killed last month. So I took a shit on the carpet."

"I was walking down the road when I ... ...saw an Afghan bloke standing on a 5th floor balcony shaking a carpet. I shouted up to him""Whats up, Abdul, wont it start?"""

"Why dracula drinks the blood of virgins The same reason we put ""virgin"" into olive oil"

"So I asked my friend, if you could be in the sun as long as possible and not get sun burnt but the majority of the world hates you, would you do it? And my friend said yeah. Okay you're black."

"What do you call a gay guy who blends in really well with his straight friends? homogeneous"

"My plans must be so fat they never work out."